1. The title. How many rings are there? Is Kody going to make a cameo with his four wives. Is Gollum going to share now that there is more than 1 ring.
2. The smelly shirt. Is this what love means nowadays? How many weeks have this shirt been unwashed to literally have your body odor?
3. The call. Someone actually said 7 days. If I get that call, I’m going ok, after 7 days how much do I have to pay to renew? Seriously its more horrifying to not hear anything.
4. It’s a marriage preview. Start the movie with sex, enter horror and possibility of death, no more sex. We call it marriage. It ties in with the title too, don’t you think?
5. Samara. She is so pretty! I don’t believe for one second that she will kill me.
6. Sacrifice. Every stupid girl with a boyfriend in college should sacrifice her life, face death in a week for their boyfriend and when you tell him to turn around and don’t do the same, he should do it and keep asking 20 questions instead of letting you watch the movie in peace. Shut up already!
7. What are cicadas and can I eat it? I have to google this shit.
8. Hairball. Ewwwww, my cat coughs out better hairballs than that. It does not make sense. Did she eat Samara because her boyfriend didn’t get her food when he was supposed to?
9. Did someone forget to use the Braille? What happen to it? Wouldn’t it be great if the blind guy touch her hand, read the Braille and read Samara into killing him? That’s how blind people see things right, they read Braille. So read it and visualize it.
10. Now that this movie has cemented Samara’s back story, what are the odds that we are going to see a reboot in a couple of years with an entirely different back story.
Watch this movie to have a laugh!
by Olivia Reed